Ran-dom
Traditional Capitalism
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies and the economy grows.
You sell them and retire on the income.
An American Corporation
You have two cows.
You sell one and force the other to produce the milk of four cows.
You are surprised when the cow drops dead.
A French Corporation
You have two cows.
You go on strike because you want three cows.
A Japanese Corporation
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce twenty times the milk.
You then create clever cow cartoon images called ‘Cowkimon’ and market them worldwide.
A German Corporation
You have two cows.
You re-engineer them so they live for 100 years, eat once a month, and milk themselves.
A British Corporation
You have two cows.
Both are mad.
An Italian Corporation
You have two cows, but you don’t know where they are.
You break for lunch.
A Swiss Corporation
You have 5,000 cows, none of which belongs to you.
You charge others for storing their cows for them.
A Chinese Corporation
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim full employment and high bovine productivity.
You have the newsman who reported on the numbers arrested.
An Indian Corporation
You have two cows.
You worship them.
A Malaysian Corporation
You have two cows.
You sign a 40-year contract to supply milk at RM0.06 per litre.
Midway through, you raise the price to RM0.60 and threaten to cut the supply.
When the buyer agrees to the new price, you change your mind again and now want RM1.20.
The buyer decides you can keep your milk and researches and develops milk that comes from recycled cows.
Your two cows retire together with the Prime Minister.
A Singaporean Corporation
You have two cows.
One cow-beh and one cow-bu.
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